Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm eating all of the evidence.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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