i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize