I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize