i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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