Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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