do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
