i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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