i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
