Its about making memories worth repressing
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
