What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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