gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize