i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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