Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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