definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
