if you like me you must not know who I am
oh god the rape fog is back!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
