Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.

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  (214): So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat. (1-214): Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/vioy
  Replies (74) Good night (1617) Bad night (4379)
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  (716): View more from New York

  After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant

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  (716): After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant http://tfl.nu/56nj
  Replies (14) Good night (4605) Bad night (644)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.

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  (207): hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either. http://tfl.nu/vb3y
  Replies (47) Good night (6329) Bad night (1603)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.

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  (815): There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream. http://tfl.nu/rule
  Replies (12) Good night (5292) Bad night (797)
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  (914): View more from New York

  You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.

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  (914): You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property. http://tfl.nu/9au5
  Replies (14) Good night (5132) Bad night (917)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.

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  (704): He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that. http://tfl.nu/dgzr
  Replies (6) Good night (1721) Bad night (1169)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.

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  (201): Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea. http://tfl.nu/863y
  Replies (4) Good night (857) Bad night (785)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...

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  (801): I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you... http://tfl.nu/j9so
  Replies (11) Good night (2420) Bad night (551)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.

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  (215): I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets. http://tfl.nu/wd0k
  Replies (11) Good night (1586) Bad night (852)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover

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  (614): It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover http://tfl.nu/1h1b
  Replies (4) Good night (761) Bad night (423)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.

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  (305): I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me. http://tfl.nu/8pa6
  Replies (6) Good night (342) Bad night (878)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"

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  (954): He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good" http://tfl.nu/rht4
  Replies (2) Good night (523) Bad night (190)
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  (858): View more from California

  The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.

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  (858): The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good. http://tfl.nu/j93v
  Replies (3) Good night (309) Bad night (568)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??

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  (716): Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again?? http://tfl.nu/md65
  Replies (4) Good night (289) Bad night (628)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"

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  (306): you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me" http://tfl.nu/gvp7
  Replies (5) Good night (652) Bad night (329)

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