I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
handjob tips. give me some.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
