on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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