He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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