Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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