hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
