i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
