Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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