my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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