Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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