But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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