Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
