My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
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If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
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A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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