Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
