So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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