I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
