no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
