i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
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