are you so shy because you have an std?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
