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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
