White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
