I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
