JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
