Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize