After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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