Texts From Last Night

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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry

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  (484): Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry http://tfl.nu/lyzu
  Replies (127) Good night (5318) Bad night (1235)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.

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  (817): Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes. http://tfl.nu/1ozx
  Replies (16) Good night (4421) Bad night (973)
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  (366): View more from

  just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.

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  (366): just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her. http://tfl.nu/eijl
  Replies (7) Good night (4789) Bad night (1449)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms

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  (239): apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms http://tfl.nu/7buk
  Replies (8) Good night (4666) Bad night (1054)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV

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  (908): Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV http://tfl.nu/9om8
  Replies (5) Good night (1038) Bad night (2076)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock

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  (856): Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock http://tfl.nu/vedt
  Replies (7) Good night (1438) Bad night (902)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.

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  (612): Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze. http://tfl.nu/em9r
  Replies (6) Good night (2148) Bad night (1442)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Are you alive?

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.

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  (204): Are you alive? (1-204): I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all. http://tfl.nu/y639
  Replies (4) Good night (1673) Bad night (821)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something

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  (203): wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something http://tfl.nu/kee0
  Replies (4) Good night (1019) Bad night (517)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.

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  (404): I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things. http://tfl.nu/rlo1
  Replies (3) Good night (1148) Bad night (427)
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  (415): View more from California

  It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.

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  (415): It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way. http://tfl.nu/dgdv
  Replies (2) Good night (709) Bad night (330)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "

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  (217): He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick " http://tfl.nu/w39y
  Replies (2) Good night (766) Bad night (357)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.

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  (781): i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops. http://tfl.nu/wb46
  Replies (1) Good night (618) Bad night (285)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.

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  (514): The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap. http://tfl.nu/k7gv
  Replies (2) Good night (632) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"

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  (701): I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever" http://tfl.nu/o3s0
  Replies (2) Good night (666) Bad night (369)

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