Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
