I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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