Fine. I'll sleep in my office
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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