they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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