You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
