im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
