Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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