This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize
