Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
